Read Time: 5 minutes
Jason Coombs鈥 journey as a caregiver began with an emotional whirlwind. Upon learning of his wife, Brin鈥檚, cancer diagnosis, he was unsure how to navigate the path ahead. A conversation with his father provided the pivotal moment of inspiration needed.
鈥淚t鈥檚 time to take the bull by the horns,鈥 his father said.
These words ignited a sense of determination and purpose within Jason. 鈥淚t鈥檚 okay; this will be okay. I just need to get to work.鈥 And that鈥檚 when his journey as a caregiver truly commenced.
The Coombs have been married for 12 years. They met at Westminster University, where Jason was beginning his master鈥檚 degree and Brin was wrapping up hers. Their love story unfolded quickly with an undeniable connection, despite the challenges life had previously thrown their way. Brin became widowed at a young age, losing her first husband in a tragic accident. Jason was two years into his recovery from substance use disorder and the management of mental health challenges. Their shared experiences formed the foundation for their deep and profound love, leading to their engagement within six weeks of meeting.
鈥淚 made the decision that the business could fold up, and it would still be okay because I don鈥檛 want to be away from my kids as they鈥檙e going through this. I don鈥檛 want to be away from these moments with my wife.鈥 鈥 Jason Coombs
As a spouse and caregiver, Jason has had to adapt to the role, acknowledging the difficulties it presents. He emphasizes that being a caregiver isn鈥檛 about achieving perfection or knowing when one is actively caregiving; it鈥檚 a continuous process. Jason鈥檚 dedication to his family and the adjustments he鈥檚 made in his professional life have been crucial in providing Brin with the support she needs.
鈥淟ife balance is a myth. It鈥檚 about priorities,鈥 Jason says. 鈥淲hen you put priorities on caring for yourself and caring for your family, the rest just has to go. You just don鈥檛 have time to do it all. And that鈥檚 okay because your priorities are where they need to be.鈥
One major decision was to pivot his attention from his business ambitions. The Coombs are owners of a substance use treatment program with multiple locations throughout Idaho. To be present for his wife and their 7-year-old twins, Jason made the conscious choice to allow the business to operate more independently, relying on the strong leadership team. He recognized the importance of being there for his family during their time of need, even if it meant letting go of some professional duties.
鈥淚 made the decision that the business could fold up, and it would still be okay because I don鈥檛 want to be away from my kids as they鈥檙e going through this,鈥 Jason says. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 want to be away from these moments with my wife.鈥
Additionally, Jason began attending caregiver support groups offered by Huntsman Cancer Institute at the (the U). These groups provide valuable insights and suggestions for coping with the challenges of being a caregiver. Jason found solace in the shared experiences of others, learning the importance of daily check-ins, creating traditions, and being prepared for unexpected changes in plans. He expressed the impact of letting go of unrealistic expectations and focusing on the present rather than an uncertain future.
鈥淎cceptance means that I am able to thrive in the day and be present and show up for the children and show up for my wife,鈥 he says.
Jason also took advantage of Huntsman Cancer Institute鈥檚 many wellness and support services suggested by the National Cancer Institute (NCI) to . Uniquely, Huntsman Cancer Institute provides most of the wellness services offered to patients to their caregivers.
鈥淓xercising, getting rest, and eating well are all important ways to ensure caregivers don鈥檛 also become oncology patients, and the services we offer also provide caregivers some respite,鈥 says Shelley White, PhD, manager of the Wellness & Integrative Health Center at Huntsman Cancer Institute and adjunct assistant professor in the adult division of the Department of Psychiatry at the U. 鈥淭he physical and emotional distress experienced by caregivers can be treated through acupuncture, massage therapy, and music therapy. We offer group activities that include artmaking, creative writing, and music-making at no cost to enhance caregivers鈥 quality of life and reduce stress.鈥
鈥淟ife balance is a myth. It鈥檚 about priorities. When you put priorities on caring for yourself and caring for your family, the rest just has to go. You just don鈥檛 have time to do it all. And that鈥檚 okay because your priorities are where they need to be.鈥 鈥 Jason Coombs
Beyond wellness support, Huntsman Cancer Institute offers many additional resources for caregivers. The of patients with cancer.
Jason also highlights the evolving roles within the family, noting that Brin, despite her own health challenges, still cares for him and their children. Recognizing her efforts and empathizing with her struggles has helped him become a more patient and understanding caregiver.
鈥淢y wife is also a caregiver. She cares for me. She cares for the kids. She鈥檚 always thinking about us. I can鈥檛 imagine the guilt and pain that she feels when she can鈥檛 do what she wants to do for them and for me,鈥 Jason acknowledges, showcasing the mutual caregiving within their relationship.
Brin says she鈥檚 been impressed by her husband鈥檚 ability to advocate and care for her. 鈥淲e always say, in my family, 鈥榃e're living in bonus days.鈥 Those bonus days could be forever, they could be years. We don't know. But whatever it is, I'm just super grateful.鈥
Through their challenging journey, the Coombs remain an inspiring example of unwavering love in the face of adversity. Their story serves as a reminder that caregiving is a journey filled with ups and downs鈥攂ut ultimately, it鈥檚 the love, compassion, and dedication that shine through the most, making them an inspiration to all.
To hear more about Brin鈥檚 diagnosis, treatment, and the challenges of seeking treatment far from their home in Idaho, listen to our podcast.